Picture this with me and then tell me I'm wrong. You're out in the car on a drive to or from the store. It begins to sprinkle rain, maybe a drizzle of rain. So you click your wipers into the first position and let them clear the slowly accumulating rain from your line of sight. Now you're behind another car, it's raining a touch harder so you switch to the second position on the wipers and they begin to hold a continuous motion. Up to the top left then instantly down to the bottom right, up, down, up, down. As the wipers maintain this pace your windshield is clearing very fast. The only problem is the rain is not as heavy and the second position on the wiper switch is causing the blades to skip across the dry windshield.
The reasonable solution is to switch the speed back top the first position and slow them down. Not so fast, now they aren't going fast enough. What the hell!? You have 3 options. One, leave it on the first setting and hope you don't smash the car in front of you. Two, you switch the setting to the second speed and let the blades skip across the windshield and annoy the shit out of you for the rest of the drive. Or three, manually activate the blades yourself with a pulling down on the wiper blade lever...every time you need a speed in between one and two.
It makes me wonder if car manufacturers even drive cars or are they just driven around by paid drivers. Every time it rains around here I do my best to not even turn my wipers on just to avoid this predicament. Give us a 1.5 speed so we can all drive, hands free, vision clear and nerves unfrazzled!
Also, why the fuck is it called a windshield. A little head buffering would do some people good. I'm more concerned about the bugs splattering left and right, oh and the rocks that always take a direct shot at my face going down Mercury Blvd. It's a bug and rock shield not a windshield!
Sleep well, Stay strong and most of all NEVER CONFORM!
-JB
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