Monday, February 11, 2013

The Lost Popcorn

     I took a majorly long break from the blog game because of the lack of views and interest in my mind but it appears that I may have been performing a disservice to society by doing so.  The blog is ALIVE!

     Every day, we rise from our slumber and stumble out of bed only to hurl ourselves into the daily routine and end up at work.  I don’t know how many of you have a desk to sit at or a rolling desk chair at that desk but I have been graciously blessed with them.  Something very irritating happened to me today involving that rolling desk chair and my daily snack.

     I was taking my little tiny day break, munching on some delicious Orville Redenbacher’s Gourmet Popping Corn at my desk while pretending to look at my computer screen at a document I have been working on.  I was placing the popcorn in my mouth 3 at a time, masticating on it and then swallowing it down my gullet.  I went for a single perfectly popped piece of popping corn; I had it in my grasp.  Suddenly, my fingers collapsed together and the popping corn went flying then falling to the ground. 

     Not being one to leave a mess on the floor I quickly pursued it.  As I slowly pushed myself from my desk, utilizing my rolling desk chair, I briefly spotted the escaped piece of popping corn lying on the floor.  Had I listened closer, I may have heard it cries of terror and despair.

     Unbeknownst to me, the piece of popping corn was lying in the direct path of my left front desk chair wheel.  As I glided back so I could retrieve the popping corn from the floor, my desk chair wheel maliciously and masochistically rolled over top of it without mercy.  The popping corn’s extremities were strewn about on the floor and it rested there, sobbing, screaming, suffering.

     Oh poor little popping corn, oh how I wish I could redo my day and save your life from such a horrible crushing death, granted I would have had to drop you specifically again then go out of my way to try to gingerly retrieve you so that you may end up in my trash receptacle and live a nice happy life dodging sea gulls at the landfill.  Oh how I wish I could do that for you!

     Goodnight sweet baby Orville Redenbacher Movie Theater Butter Gourmet Popping Corn, goodnight!

     Sleep well, Stay strong and most of all NEVER CONFORM!

  

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